Today's daily horoscope from Cosmo says:
Whether you're single or attached, sensual Mars sends your sexy appeal into the red zone. Consider ambushing your man the moment he opens the door, or practice your seduction skills on a hottie you want to know better.
Umm...hello? He's on crutches...what do they suggest, knocking him over? Cuz that's what would happen if I were to "[ambush my] man the moment he opens the door." Seriously now...what chance does this horoscope have of coming to fruition?
I want to shoot my stepdad! Seriously, what the hell was he thinking when he decided to do laundry? Because now I have to rewash the stuff that he took out of the dryer since he put it in a laundry basket that the cat has peed in. F***ing idiot. Just because he wanted his new quilt clean and couldn't wait an extra day for it. I went downstairs to run the 'Quick Wash' cycle on the towels I put in the washing machine yesterday because I ran out of time and didn't put them in the dryer (they were gonna smell funky if I just went ahead and put them in the dryer today), but when I opened the washing machine I saw the quilt. That's how I learned that my "clean" clothes were in the laundry basket used to put the sorted dirty clothes. Hence the dirt in the bottom of the laundry basket. How stupid do you have to be to put clean clothes into a container with a layer of dirt on the bottom of it? Grr.
Anyway...
Does Jessica Simpson realize how stupid this quote of hers makes her sound? I don't think daddy was around to clean things up for her after she opened up her big, stupid mouth. He was too busy making sure his younger daughter and herbisexual fiancé were getting some sort of press. (I don't think Pete Wentz is bisexual, it's just that there's always some sort of rumor going around)
Poor firstborns...always having to take the blame...always having the strictest rules...hey, wait! I'm a firstborn.
I want to shoot my stepdad! Seriously, what the hell was he thinking when he decided to do laundry? Because now I have to rewash the stuff that he took out of the dryer since he put it in a laundry basket that the cat has peed in. F***ing idiot. Just because he wanted his new quilt clean and couldn't wait an extra day for it. I went downstairs to run the 'Quick Wash' cycle on the towels I put in the washing machine yesterday because I ran out of time and didn't put them in the dryer (they were gonna smell funky if I just went ahead and put them in the dryer today), but when I opened the washing machine I saw the quilt. That's how I learned that my "clean" clothes were in the laundry basket used to put the sorted dirty clothes. Hence the dirt in the bottom of the laundry basket. How stupid do you have to be to put clean clothes into a container with a layer of dirt on the bottom of it? Grr.
Anyway...
Does Jessica Simpson realize how stupid this quote of hers makes her sound? I don't think daddy was around to clean things up for her after she opened up her big, stupid mouth. He was too busy making sure his younger daughter and her
Poor firstborns...always having to take the blame...always having the strictest rules...hey, wait! I'm a firstborn.
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