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As of February 23, 2012, I have a very sweet, very cute little boy. Baby PGS is my world now.

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Friday, December 12, 2008

I know you gotta clue what you're doing you can play brand new to all the other chicks out here but I know what you are what you are baby

***Okay, okay...so I didn't post this on the "right" day...I didn't even do it a day late like I usually do...but, hey, better late than never, right? Four days after the fact is still good...

Here's the weekly round-up of what I found interesting this week:
.:. Wow...talk about an honest, good person...
.:. Aww, how sweet is that? And a happy ending, too!! Yay for puppies!!
.:. Soo...just how was it was determined that 2008 would be the one second longer year?
.:. Well...isn't that a bleak outlook...only 1 in 50 states in the U.S.A. passes the affordability test. No, duh...recently WSU emailed current students/staff/faculty to say that enrollment was down and something else, but not to worry...yeah, it sounded worrisome to me...
.:. And then there are the lyin', cheatin' students...but don't worry, they don't see anything wrong with their personal ethics/morals. Anyone else see something wrong with that?
.:. Umm, so I attempted to figure out where MI falls on the corruption scale...but it was too confusing...but, hey, ND is top of the list.
.:. Umm, yeah...dude, that just totally sucks...and is totally embarrassing...
.:. Oh em gee...people, c'mon, why? It's just a cat...
.:. Aww, poor little rhesus monkey...
.:. Aww, poor fat puppy...luckily he was an obese puppy dog though, he would've died otherwise...
.:. Umm, yeah...don't get me wrong, I love books as much as anyone else...but over 100 grand?
.:. Ickgh ::shudder:: Why? What was the appeal? Those things don't have a taste, I mean, not other than paper anyway...
.:. Holy s***, that's insane...how'd they manage to get away with stealing $100 million in diamonds?!?
.:. Not that I agree with the views of the man, but this is pretty interesting...
.:. Haha, what an unfortunate way to get caught...vomited the evidence in front of the cops.
.:. Umm...was what this mother did really legal?
.:. Well, that's comforting.
.:. So...what do you think he did for his "nagging" wife?
.:. Yeah, it doesn't look good for the 911 dispatcher...hopefully, things are looking up for the family...
.:. Okay, so...I've thought of doing something vindictive in nature...but the difference is I didn't do anything, crazy pyro ex-girlfriend.

And now for some amusement from Overheard in New York...

The Voters Have Spoken
Guy: Want to come back to my place?
Girl: I thought you had a girlfriend.
Guy: I told you, I just haven't broken up with her yet!
Girl: Fine, but you still have a girlfriend.
Guy: F*** that. I still have a girlfriend only in the same sense that Bush is still President.
-- Blue & Gold

Then They Should Have Those Metal Lap Bars, Like on Roller Coasters
Rookie commuter: I don't understand, all these people are standing at the doors, but nobody is leaving the train.
Experienced commuter: Umm, that's because were still moving. They tend to discourage that. Even if you know how to tuck and roll...
-- Metro North, Grand Central Terminal

She Put the Lime in Her Coconut, and I Drank 'em Both Up
Lesbian: Rachel's dying her hair again, she's going back to redhead. She's so dedicated! Every time she changes her hair color she makes sure she does the whole job, just for me!
Friend: Uh, doesn't one usually do the "whole job" when dying hair?
Lesbian: No, no, I mean she dyes *down there*, you know?
Friend: Ah, right, gotcha. (pause) Uh, wasn't she lime green last month?
-- F Train

When I'm Awake, I Drink to Forget the Dreams
Guy #1, leaving: Bye! Sweet dreams.
Girl to guy #2: I hope so, last night I had a really bad dream. What about you?
Guy #2: I had dreams last night. It's my reality that's the problem.
-- Hopscotch Cafe

Stand Clear Of the Closing Gryffindors, Please.
Conductor: Hello, and welcome to the Hogwarts Express. This is platform 9 3/4, and we will be leaving shortly for Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.
Preteen holding Harry Potter book, to suit holding Harry Potter book: Oh my god! I knew they would come for me!
Suit holding Harry Potter book, to himself: I did too.
-- C Train

Only When Ultimate Fighting Practice Is Cancelled
Teenage thug #1: Yo, dude! On Oprah there was this guy who was preggers, f***ing crazy man!
(pause)
Teenage thug #2: You watch Oprah?
-- LaGuardia High School

Is There a "Ctrl Z"?
(teen #1 presses the 26th floor button. Teen #2 presses 21-25th floors for fun)
Teen #1: Dude, what the hell did you do that for?! You're an idiot, I hope you fall off my roof and die!
(pause)
Teen #3, seriously: Can we unpress it?
-- Elevator, Bay Ridge

Whoa, Breakthrough
6th grader #1: I don't want to go to tennis, I want to stay after school today.
6th grader #2: I can't, I'm going to be out until 7.
6th grader #1: Why?
6th grader #2: I have a social life.
6th grader #1: You don't have a social life; you have a therapist!
-- Trevor Day School

It's the Prospect of Going Home to Queens, Honey
Little boy watching a man: What the f***?
Mother, reading a newspaper: You better watch your mouth today, little boy!
Little boy: But Mommy, he keeps banging his head on the pole!
Mother, watching the man: What the f***?
-- F Train

Wednesday One-Liners Are Bringin' Sexy Barack
Little boy to father: When are the bad people leaving the White House so Obama can be President?
-- Grocery Store, 71st & 1st Ave
and there are six more one liners...

All Your Toys, Sure
Mother to six-year-old son: Of course I love you! You are my son, I love every bit of you!
Son: Even my balls?
-- Grand Central Station

Wednesday One-Liners, If You Know What I Mean
Woman to security guard: Excuse me, did you see a man with a really large package? I'm looking for a man with a large package. Did he come by yet?
-- 51st St & 6th Ave

LIRR worker, yelling over tracks to another who is carrying huge bolt fastener: Hey! Nice nuts!
-- Woodside Station

Lab instructor, showing students how to breathe carbon dioxide by blowing into the test tube through a straw: Don't blow too hard, or else the whole thing will come up all over your face.
-- Biology Lab, Hunter College

Very old woman to decorative hardware salesman: It's become such a problem--I just can't seem to keep my knobs tight anymore!
-- Gracious Home, 67th St & Broadway

Mother waiting for kid in the bathroom: Billy, will you stop singing and just come?
-- Waiting Room, Grand Central

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