Seriously, what the hell was I thinking?
I wanted a guy's perspective on why I'm only getting platonic attention from guys lately, so I asked the one guy that I'm "friends" with, but I know does not want anything more than friendship ever from me. Yeah...I think he hates me, because it was a disaster (okay, maybe I'm overreacting...nah, there's a real chance that I'm overreacting). I know that he doesn't like me, so I figured maybe he could help me figure out what's wrong with me. Instead he took it as an opportunity to tell me everything that went wrong with our relationship. I didn't ask him to meet me so that we could get into a fight. Honestly. That wasn't my intention...if it had been, then I would have been meaner. I wouldn't have been accidentally mean as a defense mechanism. I didn't even want to discuss anything that had to with us. I know it's over, I can't do anything about that, so asking questions and talking about it isn't going to help...it's just going to make it worse (for me, at least).
I stupidly asked him before leaving when he stopped loving me, if he ever did at all (meaning if he ever loved me). And the answer he gave to the question pretty much contradicted what he had told me less than 30 minutes before...and made my belief about him being a liar even stronger.
Hence, me thinking I made [one of] the biggest mistake of my life by asking him to help me figure out what's "wrong" with me.
Oh, well...live and learn?
I wanted a guy's perspective on why I'm only getting platonic attention from guys lately, so I asked the one guy that I'm "friends" with, but I know does not want anything more than friendship ever from me. Yeah...I think he hates me, because it was a disaster (okay, maybe I'm overreacting...nah, there's a real chance that I'm overreacting). I know that he doesn't like me, so I figured maybe he could help me figure out what's wrong with me. Instead he took it as an opportunity to tell me everything that went wrong with our relationship. I didn't ask him to meet me so that we could get into a fight. Honestly. That wasn't my intention...if it had been, then I would have been meaner. I wouldn't have been accidentally mean as a defense mechanism. I didn't even want to discuss anything that had to with us. I know it's over, I can't do anything about that, so asking questions and talking about it isn't going to help...it's just going to make it worse (for me, at least).
I stupidly asked him before leaving when he stopped loving me, if he ever did at all (meaning if he ever loved me). And the answer he gave to the question pretty much contradicted what he had told me less than 30 minutes before...and made my belief about him being a liar even stronger.
Hence, me thinking I made [one of] the biggest mistake of my life by asking him to help me figure out what's "wrong" with me.
Oh, well...live and learn?
Live and learn indeed!
ReplyDeleteHang in there! I promise, things will get better with time!