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As of February 23, 2012, I have a very sweet, very cute little boy. Baby PGS is my world now.

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Friday, September 5, 2008

I try to make you see my side always trying to stay in line but your eyes see right through that's all they do I'm getting tired of this s***

And now for the weekly round-up of the things that I found interesting this week:
.:. Apparently, DVRs are good for more than just saving tv shows...they save relationships, too...
.:. This article from Psychology Today: In Brief: From Success to Snuggles had some interesting stuff in it...
.:. animals are so adorable!!
.:. Crazy, talking bird gets a door broken down by the cops because of a 'help me!' imitation...tsk tsk...
.:. Poor heroin addicted elephant...but at least he's finally kicked his habit with the help of rehab...
.:. Seriously, what is a dead shark doing in Lake Michigan?
.:. speed limits on German highways, but a skateboarder is wanted for speeding on a German highway?
.:. This is just too weird...a cross dressing thief left his fake breast behind...
.:. Umm, yeah...if you're attempting to cash in on your life insurance policy by faking your own death, it's probably best not to make a doctor's appointment within the first six months of your alleged death...
.:. Holy s***...what a wacko! She stalked her virtual ex...even tied her poor, little dog!
.:. This is a bad situation with a happy ending...

Here's a quiz on contact from Psychology Today, let's see if you can do any better than I did (I only got two of them correct)...
Contact Quiz

Match the six emotions with the types of touch:

A = Anger; D = Disgust; F = Fear; G = Gratitude; L = Love; S = Sympathy

1. _______ Stroking, finger interlocking, rubbing
2. _______ Squeezing, hitting, trembling
3. _______ Trembling, shaking, squeezing
4. _______ Pushing, lifting, tapping
5. _______ Shaking, lifting, squeezing
6. _______ Patting, stroking, rubbing

Click here for the answers

I want to go to these shows:
.:. The Nutcracker at the Detroit Opera House ticket info almost any of the dates/times will work...
.:. Aladdin at the Detroit Opera House ticket info either time will work...
Somebody should take me (or y'know, go with me), that would be awesome.

And lastly for the weekly round-up, some amusement from Overheard in New York...

I Know I'll Never Need Anything Else As Long As I Live
Little girl: Please?
Father: I'm not paying attention to you.
Little girl: Pleeeeeeease? Do you want me to cry? I'll cry. Do you want me to cry, daddy? (holds up stuffed owl) Just get this for me and I'll be happy, please?
-- Gift Shop, Museum of Natural History

Sometimes One Is Unable to Rise to the Occasion
(little girl starts reading aloud the ads on train)
Girl: Dad! Dad! How do you say that word?
(dad looks over at the ad and tries to ignores her)
Girl: Im-po-tent! Impotent! Dad! What does "impotent" mean?
-- 1 Train

...Without Sashimi
Woman: Honey, how about McDonald's? You want some chicken nuggets?
Toddler in a stroller: I'd rather die.
-- JFK Airport

Your Real Parents Are Never Coming for You, Kid
(family stands facing the empire state building)
Tourist son: Mom, which one is the Empire State Building?
Tourist mom: I think it's the one with the circley top. (points to the Chrysler Building)
Tourist dad: No, honey, it's the one way out there, on the water.
Tourist son #2: That's the Statue of Liberty. (to no one in particular) I can't believe I'm part of this f***ing family.
-- Top of the Rock

Plus, It Would Be a Good Way to Keep Her Weight Down
Boyfriend: I've got it. A giant human hamster ball.
Girlfriend: You are not putting our daughter in a hamster ball to keep her away from weird men.
Boyfriend: But you have to admit it's better than the idea of a leash or the electric fence.
-- 81st & York

I Sell Myself Magic Beans Every Morning
Mr. Smith* (lifting student's backpack): That's overloaded. You need to get a boyfriend to carry that for you.
Student: I don't need a boyfriend.
Mr. Smith: Then find some sucker to carry it for you.
Student: I'm my own sucker!
-- Stuyvesant High School

The Day New York Stood Still
Atlantic Avenue announcement: The 2, 3, 4, 5, b and q trains are not running into Manhattan. As an alternative, take the n, d, or r trains.
Pacific Street announcement: The n, d and r trains are not running into Manhattan. As an alternative, take the 2, 3, 4, 5, b or q trains.
-- Atlantic/Pacific Subway Station

So, Wanna F***?
Good looking suit to lunch date: How about this--let's say that you and I are equally attractive. Now let's say that on any given day we each see 1,000 people of the opposite sex (a lot more, obviously, but that's a good number). You, as a woman, could sleep with approximately 850 of them--that 1,000 is discounted by the 100 who are gay (10%, as they say), and the 50 who are faithful to their wives/girlfriends. Now for me--I see 1,000 women, but 850 is way too high a number for me--maybe, if I'm lucky, I could find a few skanks in the group willing to bang a guy they don't know. Aside from that, I'm looking at 2-3 dates, dinners, phone calls, all that s***. That's why it's easier for girls.
Date: Wow.
Good looking suit: It's simple math.
Date: You would only allow 50 faithfuls? Sheesh.
Good looking suit: Men are scum.
-- Bryant Park

How the Hennecino Was Born
Starbucks barista (giving out some samples): Hey, would you like to sample our frappuccino?
Man with a bottle in a brown paper bag: Pssh. Nah. That shit don't go good with Hennessy.
Starbucks barista: Oh, okay. Have a good day.
Man with a bottle in a brown paper bag: Wait, sorry. That was f***ed up. Do you wanna sample my Hennessy?
-- Delancy & Allen, Lower East Side

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